Have not posted in awhile. Seems like the things I love most are gradually slipping away from me and I feel so powerless to stop it. Tuffy is now completely paralyzed in his hind quarters. After spending hundreds of dollars on testing and specialists, there is still no clear diagnosis of what is happening to him. Best guess is that it is a blood clot, or a few small blood clots. I'm not buying it though. It happened gradually, not suddenly like a stroke would be..and the vet has never said anything was wrong with his heart..which is how the blood clots form. Even so, he is started on an herbal blood thinner. I pray that it works. That something works. Kind of at my wits end with this. I feel like I'm being punished, losing both of my boys so close together. I know that is not the case, but sometimes it feels like it. Sometimes it feels more than I can take.
But then I feel a little head nudge my hand and start to purr. Tuffy is still Tuffy..and truthfully, he was never a very active cat to begin with. He loves to eat and to be near me. And those things haven't changed. I don't know...sometimes it seems like everything good in my life happened so long ago, and I'm trying to get back to a good place but it seems so far away. I'm trying to stay positive, to focus on the things in my life that are good. One foot in front of the other I suppose. I have no choice.